I was thinking today that I was a veteran mom. And then I thought, says who? So, I thought I would post about all the mommy badges that I think I’ve earned.
This isn’t an entirely original idea. Well, I had the idea and then I googled “mommy badge” to discover that Mama Merit Badges existed. I like her style. She posts 10 badges that include breastfeeding, medical, tantrum, travel, diaper, sleeping, and first birthday. Perfect. In my head though, I had a lot more specific badges in mind. Get comfy, this could take a while.
Constant Morning Sickness Badge – I earned this badge for two pregnancies. I was sick from conception until delivery with both girls. Awesome times included throwing up at work and a trip to the ER for dehydration. Two badges please.
Extreme Puke Badge - Like most parents, I have been thrown up on, lots of times. But, I have one memorable car trip that I call “the puke mobile” that earns me one major badge – a big one! On New Year’s Eve 2009 my mom and I drove 6 hours to North Dakota with both girls. Twenty minutes into the trip my nearly two-year old daughter threw up. That was a bad omen. The poor sweetie puked pretty much the entire trip. Puke on a car seat is horrendous. And the lesson learned from that trip means that I pack a roll of paper towels, wet wipes, plastic bags, and 3 outfit changes per girl minimum. My mom was a champ. I owe her.
Extreme Poop Badge - This badge can be earned for extraordinary poop events. I have photographic evidence of at least one momentous poop with my youngest. 
I definitely earned this badge several times over. The last time involved toddler poop all over a bean bag. Disgusting.
Crying Badge - I earned mine for crying during shots and at daycare drop off.
Being “THAT” Family Badge - This badge can be earned for making a scene in a public space in a way that disturbs the peace and wrecks your sanity. Usually it involves a series of embarrassing events that spiral out of control. Our latest incident involved a diaper leak, a dramatic strawberry milk spill, outfit changes for both girls, and a major meltdown when I threw away the remainder of the milk after the toddler said she was done – then changed her mind. We got out of there as fast as we could.
What other badges should I add? What badges have you earned?
